After many lunch meetings and casual dinners, I have come to the conclusion that there are two categories of people in the world, and from these two categories, we can derive all we need to know about any individual we come in contact with.
Ok, so maybe it isn't the solution to finding everything about a person in one word, but it's not too far off. Hear me out...
The Theory: There are two categories which most (not all) people fit into - those who like chain restaurants and those who like those onsies-"mom and pop"-type restaurants.
The Chain People...
- Know what they are getting into
- Enjoy forming close relationships
- Find comfort in repetition
- Play it Safe
- Follow trends
- Take low risks but are guaranteed a profit
Let's expound on the broad list above. People who frequent chain restaurants walk in knowing exactly what's on the menu and pretty much exactly what they want. There are no guessing games or high risk moves - you can hardly consider trying the grouper versus salmon is that monumental of a risk.
But I digress... Serial chain addicts enjoy forming relationships with even the most casual of encounters, which is, in this case, the relationship between the customer and the waiter/waitress. Now, I do realize that this can be applied to the "mom-n-pop" category too yet it takes on a different light.
Repetition - one of the main attributes of the "chain" category. These people probably park in the same spots at work, eat the same meals for breakfast, and maybe even have their underwear labeled by the day. I jest; but really, there's a comfort in knowing. Knowing that you will be happy with the service, you will be able to find something you like on the menu, and you will get your money's worth. No shame in it! Hey, I bet if we could, we would all have labeled undies. It would certainly make our mornings a little less complicated.
These people general existence can be summed up in "playing it safe." You know that feeling you get when you walk in to a new restaurant? You have no idea where the restrooms are. Are you supposed to seat yourself? Is there a smoking section?! Will you be floored by the prices??! Chain-ers (as i like to call them) have little to worry about. Often referred to as "regulars," these guys know everything there is to know about what they do most. This can be applied to their every-day activities as well. 5 bucks says they have a rigorous schedule; they are probably on time to most events, and they more than likely stick to their (much hated) budgets.
Trend setters be grateful - those who fall into this group make you or break you. The trend follower realizes that if enough people thought that it was good enough for them, then it must be good enough for me. This idea could not be any more accurate! I'm pretty sure that thousands of people aren't flocking to the nasty restaurant to spend their hard-earned monies for a meal they know they will hate (McDonald's in not included in this statement).
Lastly, the members of the category of the chain restaurant clan (long name, i know) take low risks and ergo are guaranteed somewhat of a profit, although that profit may not be as dramatic as the high-risk-taker category of "onesie-restaurant lovers". I'm sure they ask themselves "If I have ten bucks for lunch, why would I potentially waste it on something i could potenially hate when i could spend it on something I know I like?" Which, folks, is one very valid -and boring- argument.
In summary, the above mentioned category loves routines; thrives off of repetition; enjoys being considered the "regulars," and is there anything wrong with this? Absolutely not. I'm just stating a fact. Next post, I'll address the attributes of the "onesies-clan" - the proverbial mom-n-pop shop customers.
So... do you agree? Disagree? Fall way too inline with this category? Let's hear it! And remember, there's no such thing as a free lunch... unless the waiter spills his tray on you- then contact the manager and eat that free meal like you've never eaten before.
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